If you had a clone, and you weren’t wearing perfume and your clone was, I’d automatically think your clone was more attractive.

“No footless parking. Violators will be toed.”

“I don’t use coarse humor, but occasionally I’ll joke about intercourse—between …”

“I don’t believe in the zodiac. Whenever anybody asks me what my sign is, I alwa…”

“A brick could replace the cardboard bill on a baseball cap. On a windy day, no …”