I’ll buy you a dress at half price, and hopefully half as much cloth was used and it’s twice as short as you’d prefer.

“An elephant trunk is a metaphor for a penis. But not just any penis—my penis.”

“A brick can be neither good nor bad. A brick just is. And it isn’t, because I j…”

“In a battle, an army of farts would surely beat an army of noses, even if those…”

“I want to invent a drug to help people get off drugs.”