I’ll leave the door unlocked. Be sure to ring the doorbell before you climb in through the window.

“I once had a professor who could condense an entire lecture into a can of froze…”

“Love is like a rolling rock—with wheels. And legs, too! But no breaks or shoes …”

“A blanket could be used for a soft opening of a new casino. The softer the bett…”

“Dear cat, your ears are flipped inside out, so I know you’re not listening to a…”