I’ll tug at your breasts like a thirsty child. Try not to burn your nipples in my hot coffee. While you’re at it, I also like sugar in my coffee.

“A brick could be translated into Spanish, and then used to landscape a lawn.
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“Laying on top of me is better than laying on a bed, because a bed doesn’t give …”

“I always lift both lids of the toilet seat before I pee. Then I sit down while …”

“I’d rather fall in molten lava than fall in love. But I suppose that’s just the…”