I’m in danger of losing my job as official scribe to my inner voice.

“My grandpa passed a few days ago. But I’m not sad. He was only driving 20 miles…”

“When I get excited I drool. That’s why I buy bibs wholesale from my dentist. Ba…”

“I poured a compass into my coffee, to give the flavor some direction.”

“I once saw the world’s ugliest baby drown. But then I realized, “That’s not a b…”