I’m not gentlemanly. When I’m gentle, I’m not manly, and when I’m manly, I’m not gentle.

“At the end of the universe you’ll find a door labeled “Do Not Enter.” No great …”

“A brick could be used to test how fast you throw a baseball, if, you know, base…”

“There are days when I don’t know how I live with myself. Those days are Sundays…”

“Poor Chad. Not the country, but the guy. Oh, and the country’s poor too. I feel…”