It’s not really masturbating if you’re jacking your clone off. It’s more like politics.

“I keep my phone on vibrate, and I keep it close to my genitals. You should call…”

“I met a man named Birthday. I didn’t tell him when I was born, because I though…”

“I don’t just have one mustache, I have two. You can hardly notice them, though,…”

“I’m thinking of changing my name to “Son of Manana.” Of course it isn’t accurat…”