I've been able to sleep with my eyes open ever since I started watching baseball.

“On second thought, maybe “Penis on a Stick Ice Cream Parlor” is not such a good…”

“I eat overcast skies for breakfast, because sunlight isn’t filling enough. As a…”

“My headboard has bars, like a jail cell. Sometimes I’ll be asleep and think I’m…”

“More Americans died in WWII than in any other world war, with the possible exce…”