I’ve got hair in my mouth, because I replaced my teeth with my cat. This makes it more fun to pet my gums.

“I want to type one of my books into a free online translation website, and conv…”

“Love is the thing that holds life together. Sort of like rind to a melon, cloth…”

“We can’t be lovers because we both have mustaches. But since you’re a lady, and…”

“If I walked in on two of my clones having sex, I’d think it was gay, incestuous…”