Life seems so am/pm. But really it’s not as balanced as all that.

“When I couldn’t grow a full beard I took it as a sign from God to grow a mustac…”

“A blanket could be used to draw a map on—a treasure map, and not something Goog…”

“Randy Rowdy makes me rowdy. And randy. But Randy Randy gets me twice as horny a…”

“I don’t mind waiting rooms. I’m waiting on the love of my life, so I may as wel…”