My father went AWOL the day I got dishonorably discharged from his penis.


“I used to swim and dream of having a few Olympic gold medals to my name. But th…”

“Work hard or don’t work hard, either way your hair will turn gray. I should let…”

“A brick could help get your unruly hair under control, by getting at the root o…”

“I remember my first cell phone number still. I may call it and ask to speak to …”