My life motto: My brakes are broke, but luckily my gas pedal works just fine.


“With sex, I’d recommend practicing a lot. But remember, have fun with it. After…”

“I hear what you say in what you don’t say, you see, because I’m a Helen Keller …”

“I skinned a skunk to make a rug. You know, for the bathroom.”

“I mopped up my moped off the street, and drove home on the unicycle below my ha…”