Of all the pessimistic people, I am the most optimistic. I look forward to looking down on all the people looking up to me for answers from below.

“I feel like having another thigh and calf would give me a leg up on my competit…”

“Love is a blue balloon that wants to be orange. Go Gators!”

“It’s so windy outside that there are waves in my cereal bowl. I was out of milk…”

“A blanket could be used to barter with. I could trade my blanket for your sex, …”