Of all things possible, the impossible is the only one worth skipping sex for.

“To me, life is sad, like a piano with no pedals being played by a person with n…”

“Sure, I pee in the pool. But that’s only because I don’t have a sink big enough…”

“Fashion Tip Number 12: Gray is not the color to wear if you want to get noticed…”

“There’s a pubic hair in my soup. I’m pissed, because I paid for many more to be…”