Salmon swim against my stream of consciousness.

“I run my household like a marathon. That’s 26.2 miles of me taking orders from …”

“A brick could be used like sandpaper, to smooth out a cat’s rough tongue.
”

“I make love like a lump of cold oatmeal. I apologize if that mental image excit…”

“I got him a cool gift. I got him a pack of razors, and a really furry dead cat.”