So I enrolled at the University of North Florida, which, as you can imagine, is in north Florida. That’s about all I have to say about the school itself, as it’s so bland that if it were a food it would be oatmeal. Cold oatmeal.

“I would have enjoyed “Naked Lunch” that day, but the cafeteria served us all cl…”

“Doors open up for you when you work hard. Doors also open up for you when you w…”

“You drink wine by the glass, and I drink wine by the trashcan. Seriously, I’ll …”

“My grandmother got approved right before the law changed, so naturally she got …”