Somebody took my bicycle tire, my bicycle seat, and both my pedals. They stole my whole unicycle!

“My OCD governs my actions like a governor, but I didn’t vote for it. No, I vote…”

“I heard God in the silence. I recognized his voice precisely because it was ina…”

“When I visit England, I want to bring back the best souvenir an American can ge…”

“Laughter is the sound of the soul dancing. My soul probably looks like Fred Ast…”