The government is so efficient it often takes two people to do the work of one. Actually, more accurately, it takes twice the manpower to do half the work.

“I am a duck. I’m cool and calm on the surface, but underneath it all is a nonst…”

“I don’t think he’s dumber than a politician. But only because it’s not possible…”

“I cried so hard after I put my cat to sleep. I guess I shouldn’t have cried so …”

“A blanket could be used instead of a blindfold when kidnapping someone. And the…”