The thing that has impacted life on earth the most is life on mars. That’s where the government is storing all my clones.

“What I’m doing is not doing anything, and I’m doing a half-ass job.”

“Love lets us ride on its back as if it were a camel. But you’ve got to water it…”

“I prefer long-distance relationships. If we were dating, would you be offended …”

“Love is like a cloudless blue sky. That’s why I always carry an open umbrella.”