There were only two of us left for dinner, and that’s when I realized what I was: leftovers.

“I like to vote, but not be voted on. I don’t mind losing one on one, but to los…”

“When anybody honks at me in traffic, I blush, wave, and shout, “Thanks for bein…”

“My love is made out of three things: the dawn, the sunrise, and redundancy. I p…”

“I wear my shirts backwards and inside out. It helps give my genitals more breat…”