They call alcohol spirits, because it’s the spirit turned liquid. Would you drink my soul if you knew I’d use it to get inside of you? After all, most men buy women alcohol so they can get inside them too.

“My mother always told me not to pick my nose, so I’m going let the plastic surg…”

“When thinking about yesterday, contrasted with today, I can’t help but observe …”

“It's easy to say I love you, but much harder to show it. Be bold. Be in love—an…”

“My father went AWOL the day I got dishonorably discharged from his penis.
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