We all need something to embrace, even if it’s just our own torso.

“My cock is camouflaged. Check your bush.”

“I must be pregnant, because I’m craving some strange food. Right now I feel lik…”

“I wanted to make love in the rain, but owing to unfavorable (or, rather favorab…”

“I have a bedroom rug that I feed. It’s not very flat, and it meows when I step …”