When I think about my clone, random songs pop into my head. Songs like, “Happy Birthday.” Will he celebrate the same birthday as me? He’d better, because without me, there’d be nothing for him to celebrate.

“A blowjob is the only employment I can get. At least in a bathroom stall.”

“I speak the language of love. That’s right, I speak Russian.”

“A stranger left a white jacket, and it’s tempting for me to grab it, put it on,…”

“It’s not really masturbating if you’re jacking your clone off. It’s more like p…”