When the tax man cometh, lie about lying on your taxes.

“Hospitality is about welcoming you with open arms, and an outstretched erection…”

“A brick could be used in conjunction with another brick to be the Democrat and …”

“There’s a traffic jam in the stream. I’d better go fish up a solution. Too bad …”

“Ever since I was fired for sleeping on the job I’ve worn a shirt and tie to bed.”