it is an easy mistake to think that non-talkers are non-feelers.

Wallace Stegner

Tag: introversion



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My Solitude is my Treasure, the best thing I have. I hesitate to go out. If you opened the little gate, I would not hop away—but oh how I sing in my gold cage.

A.S. Byatt

Tag: peace solitude introversion



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Leave an extrovert alone for two minutes and he will reach for his cell phone. In contrast, after an hour or two of being socially “on,” we introverts need to turn off and recharge. My own formula is roughly two hours alone for every hour of socializing. This isn’t antisocial. It isn’t a sign of depression. It does not call for medication. For introverts, to be alone with our thoughts is as restorative as sleeping, as nourishing as eating. Our motto: “I’m okay, you’re okay—in small doses.

Jonathan Rauch

Tag: introversion introvert



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The walls of books around him, dense with the past, formed a kind of insulation against the present world and its disasters.

Ross Macdonald

Tag: words reading books literature introversion



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When psychologists Catherine Caldwell-Harris and Ayse Ayçiçegi compared U.S. and Turkish samples, they found that having "an orientation inconsistent with societal values" is a risk factor for poor mental health. The findings support what the researchers call the personality-culture clash hypothesis: "Psychological adjustment depends on the degree of match between personality and the values of surrounding society." To the extent that introverts feel the need to explain, apologize, or feel guilty about what works best for them, they feel alienated not only from society but from themselves.

Laurie A. Helgoe

Tag: psychology shame guilt culture depression introversion



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It is a joy to be hidden, and disaster not to be found.

D.W. Winnicott

Tag: life solitude loneliness self childhood games introversion hiding hide-and-seek hidden-self



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...And tonight—Geryon? You okay?
Yes fine, I'm listening. Tonight—?
Why do you have your jacket over your head?
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Can't hear you Geryon. The jacket shifted. Geryon peered out. I said sometimes
I need a little privacy.

Anne Carson

Tag: conversation privacy introversion



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Because loners are born everywhere, we end up living everywhere. We do not, have not, tended to single ourselves out as special, elite, requiring rarefied environments. Too often we have done the opposite; lived where we lived because our jobs were there, or families, or because we'd heard the schools were good there, or that we would love a place with changing seasons. Then, no matter what, we put our noses to the grindstone. We take living there as a fait accompli, a fact. Too often we are miserable somewhere without realizing why. We blame ourselves for not buckling down, settling in, fitting in. The problem is the place, but too often we do not see this, we will not allow ourselves to see this. It's the same old thing: This is a friendly town, so what's your problem?
...To the non-loner, or the self-reproaching loner, the fact of being a loner is not comparable to those other determinants. It is not a matter of life and death, we tell ourselves. It its not a matter of breathing or of execution by stoning. But home is the crucible of living...So how can living not be a matter of life and death?

Anneli Rufus

Tag: home environment introversion



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In an extroverted society, the difference between an introvert and an extrovert is that an introvert is often unconsciously deemed guilty until proven innocent.

Criss Jami

Tag: fear innocence society people judgment guilt skepticism blame bias introversion social-norms assumption introverts judgmental accusation extroverts extroversion judgmentality unconscious-mind



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Telling an introvert to go to a party is like telling a saint to go to Hell.

Criss Jami

Tag: humor parties social people funny hell saints party socializing introversion funny-but-true introvert introverts partying



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