He's a pig and I don't allow livestock in the house.

Erin McCarthy

Tag: insult pig



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Only five books tonight, Mommy," she says.
No, Olivia, just one."
How about four?"
Two."
Three."
Oh, all right, three. But that's it!

Ian Falconer

Tag: books bedtime pig olivia



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Seventeen, eh!" said Hagrid as he accepted a bucket-sized glass of wine from Fred.
"Six years to the day we met, Harry, d’yeh remember it?"
"Vaguely," said Harry, grinning up at him. "Didn’t you smash down the front door, give Dudley a pig’s tail, and tell me I was a wizard?"
"I forge’ the details," Hagrid chortled.

J.K. Rowling

Tag: humor harry-potter birthday pig dursley wizard hagrid



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so, what are you in for? MANSLAUGHTER!!! I SLAUGHTERED A MAN!! JUST LIKE A PIG!!! PUT HIM ON A SPIT AND PUT AN APPLE IN HIS MOUTH!!!!

Brian Regan

Tag: humor man hilarious pig manslaughter



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Sometimes the man who looks happiest in town, with the biggest smile, is the one carrying the biggest load of sin. There are smiles

Ray Bradbury

Tag: man sin good pig sty



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Always remember, a cat looks down on man, a dog looks up to man, but a pig will look man right in the eye and see his equal.

Winston S. Churchill

Tag: man pig



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Traveling through the Dragon's Den, it has just been explained that Haroun, the Ifrit, has been caught in a mirror trap. Here is the passage that follows:

"So," said Silas. "Now there are only three of us."
"And a pig," said Kandar [the mummy]
"Why?" Asked Miss Lupescu, with a wolf-tongue, through wolf teeth. "Why the Pig?"
"It's lucky," said Kandar.
Miss Lupescu growled, unconvinced.
"Did Haroun have a pig?" asked Kandar, simply.

Neil Gaiman

Tag: humor vampire pig werewolf mummy



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I remember an hypothesis argued upon by the young students, when I was at St. Omer's, and maintained with much learning and pleasantry on both sides, 'Whether supposing that the flavour of a big who obtained his death by whipping (per flagellationem extremem) superadded a pleasure upon the palate of a man more intense than any possible suffering we can conceive in the animal, is man justified in using that method of putting an animal to death?' I forget the decision.

Charles Lamb

Tag: food suffering taste justification cruelty pig flavor



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Aunt Petunia often said that Dudley looked like a baby angel — Harry often said that Dudley looked like a pig in a wig.

J.K. Rowling

Tag: pig dudley-dursley wig



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When I am alone, my table manners are rather piggish, but i suppose that's because I don't eat at a table, I eat at my desk. Which could be considered a table, except we tend to define things by their function, and this particular surface is a desk, so perhaps piggish is unfair.

Kelli Jae Baeli

Tag: humor manners eating pig table-manners



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