Don't you know? We're connected
by an invisible chain. It's very long, very
light. But also very strong. It can't rust.
Can't break. And the only thing that can sever it is if you ever stop loving me.
Fear
is a better friend than
you, who feel nothing,
beneath the weight of
my pain.
The best thing about my mom being such
a bitch is not worrying
about trying to make her
proud of me.
hindsight
is gained
through
experience
She's no longer afraid to die. What she's afraid of is living, accepting the status quo.
Ellen HopkinsStichwörter: death status-quo living
I love the way she feels in
the curve of my arm. I love
her unpretentious beauty,
her intelligence, her nerve.
But could I ever love her?
The concept of falling in love
is completely foreign, something
I can’t bring myself to accept.
Her hair pillows my cheek and
her hand on my leg is warm.
I care about you, Conner,
and I hate to see you hurting.
I want to respond but can’t
find the pretty words I need.
Stichwörter: pain love hurt impulse ellen-hopkins
I felt angry,
frustrated.
I felt I didn't belong, not in my
church, not in my home, not
in my skin.
Amidst the chaos, i felt
alone,
in need of a friend instead of
a sister, someone detached from
my world.
The "woman's role" theory
disgusted me.
I would soon be a woman, and I
knew I could never perform as
expected.
I was tired of my mom's submission
to her religion, to her husband's
sick quest for an heir,
to his abuse.
I was sick of my dad, of
reaching for
him as he fell farther away
from us and into the arms of
Johnnie WB.
Defiance rose up like vomit.
I swung back and yelled,
"Don't ever do that again!
Concentrate. Level the sight. Breathe in.
Ease the trigger. And relax?
BLAP! The can somersaulted across the sand.
Pride swelled till I thought I'd burst.
But my pride slipped at Dad's reality check.
Not bad. Pretty good, in fact. For a girl.
You think God would let a girl do something special?
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