I am concussed," I announced, entirely sure of my self-diagnosis.
John GreenI think maybe I know why,' she finally said.
'Why?'
'Maybe all the strings inside him broke,' she said.
I don't remember how it ended - if I went to bed or she did. In my memory, it doesn't end. We just stay there, looking at each other, forever.
John GreenShe said Robert Joyner had killed himself with a gun. And then I asked why, and then she told me that he was getting a divorce and was sad about it.'
'Lots of people get divorces and don't kill themselves,' I said.
'I know,' she said, excitement in her voice. 'That's what I told her.
She never acted as if she liked him all that much, but then she never acted as if she liked anyone all that much.
John GreenInteresting capitalization,' I said.
'Yeah. I'm a big believer in random capitalization. The rules of capitalization are so unfair to words in the middle.
I've lived here for eighteen years and I have never once in my life come across anyone who cares about anything that matters.
John GreenI kept waiting for that loneliness and nervousness to make me want to go back. But it never did.
John GreenThe thing about That Guy Is a Gigolo,' Radar says, 'I mean, the thing about it as a game, is that in the end it reveals a lot more about the person doing the imagining than it does about the person being imagined.
John GreenBut ultimately I do not believe that she was only matter. The rest of her must be recycled, too. I believe now that we are greater than the sum of our parts. If you take Alaska's genetic code and you add her life experiences and the relationships she had with people, and then you take the size and shape of her body, you do not get her. There is something else entirely. There is a part of her greater than the sum of her knowable parts. And that part has to go somewhere, because it cannot be destroyed
John GreenStichwörter: death
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