I look like Barbara Bush in drag." Aunt Jettie
Molly HarperStichwörter: vampire jane aunt-jettie
Eva seemed to be on some sort of mission to work her evil/cute baby magic on me. Ever since she'd started toddling around on those chubby little legs, she'd been targeting me, the least enthusiastic baby person in the room. I think she enjoyed the challenge, which proved that we were related.
Eva would tug on my pants leg until I picked her up. And then she'd basically stare me down with those big blue-grey eyes of hers, daring me not to snuggle her. It was like facing down a tiny, diapered mastermind.
And of course, I caved. I snuggled her. I babbled. I read her Where the Wild Things Are until I was hoarse. I actually found myself watching my language. Shudder.
He’s practically stalking me. He just won’t let it go. He’s just being … he’s being a jackass with a flaky jackass crust and a delicious jackass filling.”
“So he’s jackass pie?
When you’ve taken all you can, walk away. Be the bigger person. Or at least find a bigger person.
Molly HarperI was shameless in my supermarket-shelf mass-market taste. I loved King, Evanovich, Grisham and Brown. I won't lie; the oficial-looking filing cabinet in the corner is actually stuffed full of my paperbacks.
Molly HarperStichwörter: funny-and-random
Well, now I felt horrible. I'd marred perfectly good ass cheeks for no reason. It was as if I'd sneezed on the Mona Lisa.
Molly HarperStichwörter: humor
She had a knack for relieving the tension in a room by pretending my rudeness away with cooking. Many, many chickens had given up their lives to cover my conversationalist shortcomings.
Molly HarperStichwörter: funny
It was not healthy for one man's smile to make my panties spontaneously combust
Molly HarperStichwörter: humor
The best way to get over a messy break-up is to spend time with a supportive group of friends. The best
way to chase off a supportive group of friends is to talk constantly about your messy break-up.
...and challenging your neighborhood to a round of competitive outdoor decorating. Because you’re not really celebrating the birth of Jesus unless your house can be spotted by passing aircraft.
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