The average IQ in America is—and this can be proven mathematically—average.
P.J. O'RourkeStichwörter: humour maths averages iq-tests
Guns are always the best method for a private suicide. They are more stylish looking than single-edged razor blades and natural gas has got so expensive. Drugs are too chancy. You might miscalculate the dosage and just have a good time.
P.J. O'RourkeVeal is a very young beef and, like a very young girlfriend, it's cute but boring and expensive.
P.J. O'RourkeEven very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.
P.J. O'RourkeThere are no kinder or better people in the world than those who listen to you when you are 18.
P.J. O'RourkeIt’s important to understand that in the Third World most driving is done with the horn, or “Egyptian Brake Pedal,” as it is known. There is a precise and complicated etiquette of horn use. Honk your horn only under the following circumstances:
1. When anything blocks the road
2. When anything doesn’t.
3. When anything might.
4. At red lights
5. At green lights.
6. At all other times.
We all know how 'modern democracies take loaves from the wealthy.' It's the slipups in the 'pass them out to the poor' department that inspire a study of Economics.
P.J. O'RourkeStichwörter: capitalism economics socialism redistribution-of-wealth
A walk through an old graveyard shows our ancestors often had more dead children than we have live ones.
P.J. O'RourkeNature will get rights as soon as it gets duties. The minute we see birds, trees, bugs, squirrels picking up litter, giving money to charity, and keeping an eye on our kids at the park, we'll let them vote.
P.J. O'RourkeWe are endowed with a moral capacity that animals, plants, rocks-and many fervent ecologists-lack. We should not be dirty, wasteful or cruel. To do so harms others. That's wrong. Therefore we don't disembowel Bambi like the way coyotes do, we shoot him first.
P.J. O'Rourke« erste vorherige
Seite 5 von 9.
nächste letzte »
Data privacy
Imprint
Contact
Diese Website verwendet Cookies, um Ihnen die bestmögliche Funktionalität bieten zu können.