But I am happy. And happiness, I have decided, is a noble ambition.

Seth Grahame-Smith


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I am a foe to tyrants, and my country’s friend.

Seth Grahame-Smith


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I hereby resolve to kill every vampire in America.

Seth Grahame-Smith


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I feel rather like a rabbit that has taken a fox for its pupil.

Seth Grahame-Smith


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Judge them not equally.

Seth Grahame-Smith


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My men have suffered greatly (from boredom), much blood has been shed (by mosquitoes), and I have swung my ax mightily (chopping firewood). Surely we have earned our place in the annals of history—for never has there been so little war in a war.

Seth Grahame-Smith


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How shall I ever sleep again knowing she is out there in the night? How shall I ever keep another thought in my head when she is all I care to think about?

Seth Grahame-Smith


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Your quarrel is with God. I merely wish to offer Him the opportunity to judge you.

Seth Grahame-Smith


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Miss Todd, I want to dance with you in the worst way.

Seth Grahame-Smith


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one might find men in Congress who possess twice your good looks, but not one who possesses half your good sense.

Seth Grahame-Smith


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