They said you can't go to the moon. They said you can't put cheese inside a pizza crust, but NASA did it. They had to, because the cheese kept floating off in space.
Stephen ColbertStichwörter: humor inspirational humor-inspirational
Internet users, that blue screen of death you were looking at this morning? That's the sky. If you're still confused, look it up on Wikipedia tomorrow.
Stephen ColbertWhen meeting royalty, it is very important, no matter how excited you are, not to vomit on them. Instead, vomit on the nearest commoner.
Stephen ColbertIt's the way our founding fathers would have wanted it, if they had founded corporations instead of just a country.
Stephen Colbert... had to pee like a racehorse at an Iced Tea convention.
Stephen ColbertStichwörter: humor political racehorse
The skinnification of America's jeanscape has gone too far.
Stephen ColbertAttack life, it's going to kill you anyway.
Stephen ColbertI don't like the new president who hunts muslim extremists, I like the old president who is a muslim extremist.
Stephen ColbertStichwörter: politics
There's nothing wrong with stretching the truth. We stretch taffy, and that just makes it more delicious.
Stephen ColbertStichwörter: truth
God works in mysterious ways but at least he works, he's never on welfare in a mysterious way.
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