MAKE STATEMENTS also applies to us women: Speak in statements instead of apologetic questions. No one wants to go to a doctor who says, “I’m going to be your surgeon? I’m here to talk to you about your procedure? I was first in my class at Johns Hopkins, so?” Make statements, with your actions and your voice.

Tina Fey


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THERE ARE NO MISTAKES, only opportunities.

Tina Fey


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This made no sense to me, probably because I speak English and have never had a head injury.

Tina Fey


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It’s a burden, being able to control situations with my hyper-vigilance, but it’s my lot in life.

Tina Fey


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A TV show comprises many departments—Costumes, Props, Talent, Graphics, Set Dressing, Transportation. Everyone in every department wants to show off their skills and contribute creatively to the show, which is a blessing. You’re grateful to work with people who are talented and enthusiastic about their jobs. You would think that as a producer, your job would be to churn up creativity, but mostly your job is to police enthusiasm. You may have an occasion where the script calls for a bran muffin on a white plate and the Props Department shows up with a bran cake in the shape of Santa Claus sitting on a silver platter that says “Welcome to Denmark.” “We just thought it would be funny.” And you have to find a polite way to explain that the character is Jewish, so her eating Santa’s face might have negative connotations, and the silver tray, while beautiful, is giving a weird glare on camera and maybe let’s go with the bran muffin on the white plate. And then sometimes Actors have what they call “ideas.” Usually it involves them talking more, or, in the case of more experienced actors, sitting more. When Actors have ideas it’s very important to get to the core reason behind their idea.

Tina Fey


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You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it. You have to go down the chute.

Tina Fey


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You have to remember that actors are human beings. Which is hard sometimes because they look so much better than human beings.

Tina Fey


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The show doesn’t go on because it’s ready; it goes on because it’s 11:30.

Tina Fey


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It’s no more dangerous to society than a radio broadcast of The War of the Worlds.

Tina Fey


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Gay people don’t actually try to convert people. That’s Jehovah’s Witnesses you’re thinking of.

Tina Fey


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