Are you all right?" he says
tentatively.
I am not all right. I was beginning to feel that I had finally found a place to stay, a place that was not so unstable or corrupt or controlling that I could actually belong there. You would think that I would have learned by now—such a place does not exist.
"No," I say.
He starts to move around the stone block, toward me. "What is it?"
"What is it." I laugh. "Let me put it this way: I just found out you're not the worst person I know."
I drop into a crouch and push my fingers through my hair. I feel numb and terrified of my own numbness. The Bureau is responsible for my parents' deaths. Why do I have to keep repeating it to myself to believe it? What's wrong with me?
"Oh," he says. "I'm . . . sorry?"
All I can manage is a small grunt.
"You know what Mom told me once?" he says, and the way he says Mom, like he didn't betray her, sets my teeth on edge. "She said that everyone has some evil inside them, and the first step to loving anyone is to recognize the same evil in ourselves, so we're able to forgive them.
Stichwörter: caleb-tris
He pushes his hair, soaked from the snow, out of his eyes. "So what are we going to do, break a window? Look for a back door?"
"I'm just going to walk in," I say. "I'm her son."
"You also betrayed her and left the city when she forbade anyone from doing that," he says, "and she sent people after you to stop you. People with guns."
"You can stay here if you want," I say.
"Where the serum goes, I go," he says. "But if you get shot at, I'm going to grab it and run."
"I don't expect anything more."
He is a strange sort of person.
Stichwörter: abnegation-serum erudite-headquarters peter-hayes tobias-four-eaton
Yeah, sometimes life really sucks," she says. "But you know what I'm holding on for?"
I raise my eyebrows.
She raises hers, too, mimicking me.
"The moments that don't suck," she says. "The trick is to notice them when they come around.
Stichwörter: life
I catch myself thinking 'Thank God For This' out of habit, and then I understand what he's so concerned about. What if my parents' God, their whole belief system, is just something concocted by a bunch of scientists to keep us under control? And not just their beliefs about God and whatever else is out there, about right and wrong, about selfishness?
Veronica RothTo me, when someone wrongs you, you both share the burden of that wrongdoing - the pain of it weighs on both of you. Forgiveness, then, means choosing to bear the full weight all by yourself. Caleb's betrayal is something we both carry, and since he did it, all I've wanted is for him to take its weight away from me. I am not sure that I'm capable of shouldering it all myself - not sure that I am strong enough, or good enough.
Veronica RothStichwörter: inspirational
You know what Abnegation used to say about pride?'
'Something unfavorable,I assume.'
I laugh.' Obviously. They said it blinds people to the truth of what they are.
Stichwörter: wisdom-quotes
She said that everyone has some evil inside them, and the first step to loving anyone is to recognize the same evil inside ourselves,so we're able to forgive them.
Veronica RothStichwörter: wisdom-quotes
The first step to loving someone else is to recognize the evil in ourselves, so we can forgive them.
Veronica RothStichwörter: allegiant
With four? Doing a little... Addition? Multiplication?
Veronica RothStichwörter: page-255 four christina addition tris multiplication allegiant allegiant-quotes
If we stay together, I'll have to forgive you over and over again, and if you're still in this, you'll have to forgive me over and over again too. So forgiveness isn't the point. What I really should have been trying to figure out is whether we were still good for each other or not
Veronica RothStichwörter: four tris beatrice-prior tobias-eaton allegiant
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