The snag about marriage is, it isn´t worth the divorce.
Suzanne FinnamoreStichwörter: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
We talk. Darlene worries aloud that her husband works with a lot of attractive young women; she herself is fourty. I tell her it´s not about age. "Little thing called character," I say, thinking, Accepting marital advice from me: the height of lunacy.
Suzanne FinnamoreStichwörter: deception marriage infidelity divorce
Together we agree that there are few tableaus more pathetic than a woman poring over a plethora of self-help books, while in a small café across town her husband is sharing a bottle of Pouilly-Fuissé and fettucini Alfredo with a beautiful woman, fondling her fishnet knee and making careful plans to escape his life.
Suzanne FinnamoreStichwörter: deception marriage self-help infidelity divorce
Surprises, I feel now, are primarily a form of violence.
Suzanne FinnamoreStichwörter: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
To keep myself from harming or calling N and to stave off the rage and despair, I focus on my extraordinary son, drink midrange Chardonnay every night after he is asleep, and make a barrage of late-night mail-order retail purchases placed from the couch. The couch has officially become my second battle station. I am angry and I have credit And I´m all blackened inside; I should wear a pointy witch hat around Larkspur as I go to the bank and drop A off at day care. It would be more honest.
Suzanne FinnamoreStichwörter: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
God is great and God is good," Lisa says. "But where are the Apache attack helicopters when you need them?
Suzanne FinnamoreStichwörter: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
I know my vision is impaired and cannot be trusted with even the simplest tasks, much less dating. Not that I´ve come within talon distance of a man.
Suzanne FinnamoreStichwörter: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
I´m just not sending out the right vibe lately. Perhaps the fact that I wear stained sweatpants and free T-shirts is holding me back. I just can´t seem to get back into the intelligent-slut-for-hire outfits that lure men; even shoes with laces evade me. Plus my hair is Fran Lebowitz-esque. I think my eyes are getting closer together. I don´t know.
Suzanne FinnamoreStichwörter: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
How could you do that to me?" I repeat. I don´t have to itemize. He knows what I speak of.
Eventually N produces three answers, in this order:
1. "Because I am a complete rotter." I silently agree, but it´s a cop-out: I have maggots, therefore I am dead.
2. "I was stressed at work and unhappy and we were always fighting...and you know I was just crazy..."
I cut him off, saying, "You don´t get to be crazy. You did exactly what you chose to do."
Which is true, he did. It is what he has always done. He therefore seems slightly puzzled at the need for further diagnosis, which may explain his third response:
3. "I don´t know."
This, I feel instinctively, is the correct answer. How can I stay angry with him for being what he is? I was, after all, his wife, and I chose him. No coincidences, that´s what Freud said. None. Ever.
I wipe my eyes on my sleeve and walk toward the truck, saying to his general direction, "Fine. At least now I know: You don´t know."
I stop and turn around and fire one more question: a bullet demanding attention in the moment it enters the skin and spreads outward, an important bullet that must be acknowledged.
"What did you feel?"
After a lengthy pause, he answers. "I felt nothing."
And that, I realize too late, was not the whole truth, but was a valid part of the truth.
Oh, and welcome to the Serengeti. That too.
Stichwörter: deception marriage relationships infidelity divorce breaking-up cheating
Some things just couldn't be protectd from storms. Some things simply needed to be broken off...Once old thing were broken off, amazingly beautiful thing could grow in their place.
Denise Hildreth JonesStichwörter: friendship deception widowhood alcoholism second-chances bahamas natural-hurricanes spiritual-storms
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