I was in the neighborhood," he said, answering the question I was about to ask. His lips twitched. "You know, wandering around,trying to be a hero."
I sighed.
"Are you going to thank me?" Cole said. After a pause, he added, "Or hit me?"
I thought about Tommy,scared and cowering on the ground. "Thank you." Before Cole could say anything else I said, "But don't do it again."
He nodded.
I'd expected Cole to ramp up his efforts to change my mind, but was this his new approach? If so,it scared me more than any attempts he'd made to sway me in the past. It felt so real, and so genuine.I looked in his eyes, and I honestly didn't know what his motives were.Would he have saved Tommy if I weren't around? Would he have done it anonymously?
My love for Tommy was a weakness. I just didn't know if Cole was exploiting it.How did he have the power to confuse me still?
I had to get him away.He was more dangerous now than ever,because with Jack gone,and my time almost gone, he was more tempting than he'd ever been before.
Why didn't you tell me?"
"I know you won't believe it, but I thought it would be best for you. You were doing so well until I came back. I thought you could go back to how it was. You still can."
"Don't say that,Becks.We're going to figure something out."
"I know.Even so,I understand that it would've been easier for you if I'd never come back.Maybe you and Jules..."
His grip on my arm tightened,and when he spoke,his voice wavered. "Becks. I crashed when you left.Jules held together the pieces,and I will love her forever for that.But if I was with her, it wouldn't be right." He grimaced. "She told me so herself, right before I left with Will. She knew." Jack pushed my hair out of my eyes and off my forehead.
"Um,she knew what?" I could barely hear my own voice.
"It's always been you,Becks. Nothing will change that,no matter how much time has passed." He glanced down. "No matter if you feel the same way or not. You know what,right?"
I shook my head slowly,wanting desperately to believe him, but not sure if I could.
"How can you not see that? Everyone sees it." He slid his hand down my arm and grabbed my fingers, holding them in his lip,tracing them. Staring at them. "Remember freshman year? How Bozeman asked you to the Spring Fling?"
Bozeman. He was two years older than me. Played offensive lineman. His first name was Zachary, but nobody had called him that since the third grade. I'd been surprised he even knew my name, let alone asked me to the dance.
"Of course I remember.You came with me to answer him." We doorbell-ditched Bozeman's house, leaving a two-liter bottle of Coke and a note that said I'd pop to go to the dance with you, or something like that. Bozeman had a reputation for fast hands, but he didn't try anything with me. In fact,he barely touched me at all, even at the fling.And he never asked me out again.Or even talked to me, really.It was weird.
"Yeah,well,I didn't tell you, but Bozeman actually asked my permission."
"Why?"
"Because it was obvious to everyone, except you,how I felt about you.And then that night with the Coke on the porch...after I dropped you off at home, I paid Bozeman a visit." His cheeks went pink and he lowered his eyes.
"And?"
"Let's just say I rescinded my permission. I didn't realize how much it would bother me." His eyes met mine.
I could only imagine what was said between Jack and the lineman, who was twice his size.
"Don't be mad," Jack said. Like I'd be angry after everything we'd been through. "I...I'm telling you this because you have to know that it's always been you. And it will always be you.
The question I should've been asking myself was, in ninety-nine years, how will I find another Forfeit who will survive the Feed? But the question I actually asked myself was, Could Nikki ever look at me the way she looked at Jack in those final moments?
Brodi AshtonHer emotional layers had the depth of a full symphony.
All I wanted was the bathe in her harmony.
Cole, do you feel anything for me?" I don't know what made me ask this, except that Jack had asked him the night of the Tunnels. It obviously surprised him.
He backed up. "What?"
I inched forward, not quite sure I was going with this. "Do you feel...something for me?"
He was quiet, still as a statue, so I moved even closer.
"Don't, Nik." His gaze dropped to the ground.
"If you feel anything, please leave me alone. I don't know why I survived. I don't have your answer. Shadowing me will get you nothing."
Then he did something unexpected. He backed down, and as he turned around to his motorcycle, he shook his head and mumbled, "What have you done to me?"
"I don't know," I said. "But you have ninety-nine years to figure it out."
He kicked it on and revved the engine, and at the sound, he found his cocky smirk again. "That's a long time, Nik. Jack is gone, and I'm here. Let's see who gives up first.
Do you want to know the first time I ever saw you?" he said with his lips at my ear.
I knew the story,but I nodded anyway, frantically.
"Your family had just moved in. You were...how old were you,Becks?"
I shrugged,and he ran his fingers over my head, calming me.He knew the answer.
"You were eleven," he said. "I was twelve.I remember Joey Velasquez talking about the pretty new girl in the neighborhood.Actually his exact words were 'the hot chick.' But I didn't think a thing about it until I saw you at the baseball field. We were having practice at the park and your family showed up for a picnic.You had so much dark hair,and it was hiding your face.Remember?"
I nodded. "I know what you're trying to do."
He ignored me. "I had to see if Joey was right,about the hot chick part, and I kept trying to get a good look at your face, but you never looked over our way.I hit home run after home run trying to get your attention, but you couldn't be bothered with my record-shattering, supherhuman performance."
I smiled,and breathed in slowly. I'd heard this story so many times before.The familiarity of it enveloped me with warmth. "So what did you do?" I asked, fully aware of the answer.
"I did the only thing I could think of. I went up to the bat,lined my feet up in the direction of your head,and swung away."
"Hitting the foulest foul ball anyone had ever seen," I continued the story.
I felt him chuckle next to me. "Yep. I figured in order to return the ball,you'd have to get really close to me, because..." He waited for me to fill in the blank.
"Because someone made the mistake of assuming I would throw like a girl," I said softly.
He pressed his lips against my head before he went on. "Which,of course, was stupid of me to think. You stood right where you were and chucked the ball farther than I'd ever seen a girl, or even any guy,chuck it."
"It was all those years of Bonnet Ball my parents forced on me."
"The entire team went nuts. You gave a little tiny shrug, like it was no big deal, and sat back down with your family. Completely ignoring me again. So my plan totally backfired. Not only did you get the attention of every boy on the field-which was not my intention-but I got reamed by the coach, who couldn't understand why I suddenly decided to stand perpendicular to home plate.
Will you look after my family?" I attempted a smile. "Tommy's going to need a...big brother. Someone to fish with." It seemed stupid to be talking about this stuff,but there weren't any words for the bigger stuff anymore. "He makes his own flies." Jack already knew this.
"Becks-"
"And make sure he doesn't play football." Jack tilted his head at this. "I mean,football's fine, bit it's dangerous.I don't want him concussed-"
"Becks,stop."
"Just tell me you'll do it." I closed my eyes. "Tell me."
There was a long pause,and I wasn't sure there'd be time for him to answer anymore.But after a few moments,he did. "No."
My eyes shot open. "What?"
His eyes were tight,his expression on fire with blazing determination. "You watch over Will."
"What are you...?" My voice trailed off as it dawned on me what was going on. "No!" I tried to wiggle my hands free from his grip. "Don't you dare, Jack Caputo!"
But I couldn't break from his strong grasp. I twisted and thrashed but that only made Jack hold on tighter. He closed his eyes and said, "Stay with me,Becks.Dream of me. I am ever yours."
"No! I will forgive you!" I tried to pull back.Tried to get close enough for the Tunnels to suck me away instantaneously.But Jack had to be about twice my weight and pure muscle. "Let me go!"
He ignored me.In the quickest, strongest move I would ever know,Jack yanked me toward him and threw me to the ground behind him.Away from the Tunnels.
You know I have no power over the balance of the Everneath." He glanced at Jack. "Sorry,bro.Even with your biceps, we can't fight the force of nature.
Brodi AshtonJack,do me a favor?" I said.
"Anything,Becks."
"Don't let go of my hand. And if the Tunnels come for me,don't let go until the last moment."
"If the Tunnels come for you,I'll hold on, and they won't be able to take you."
I smiled at the sentiment, even though I knew that no one would be able to hold on.
SOPHOMORE YEAR
Before he was mine and I was his...
"You weren't in the lunchroom today," Jack said, coming up behind me at my locker. "Jules says you're never in the cafeteria on Wednesdays."
I tried to calm the flush to my cheeks before I turned around to face him. My crush on Jack was getting ridiculous. Pretty soon I would be nonverbal.Just because he noticed,for the first time, that I wasn't at lunch,it didn't mean anything.
I tried to keep my tone light. "Sounds like you guys had a very intriguing conversation."
"Oh,we did." Jack fell into step beside me,and we walked down the hallway at a slower pace than everyone around us. "She said you avoid the cafeteria on Wednesdays.And she said you like me."
I heard myself gasp,and I came to a stop.
I'm gonna kill Jules, I thought.
"So,is it true?" Jack said.
I could barely hear him with the crashing waves in my ears.I started to turn away,embarrassed,but Jack stepped sideways so he was in front of me, and there was nowhere else I could look.
"Is it true?" he asked again.
"Yes.I hate hot-dog Wednesdays, so I don't go to the lunchroom.It's true."
"That's not what I meant,Becks."
"I know."
"Tell me.Is it true? Do you like me?"
I tried to roll my eyes,and promptly forgot how.So I just looked at the ceiling. "You know I like you. You're one of my best friends."
"Friends," Jack repeated.
"Of course."
"Good friends?"
I nodded.
"More than friends?"
I didn't say anything. I didn't move. Jack reached toward my hand and tugged gently on my fingers. The movement was so small,I wouldn't have seen it if I hadn't felt it.
He leaned forward and said, "Tell me, friend.Is there more for us?"
I looked into his eyes. "There's everything for us.
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