Wishing for control is like wishing for the rapture.

Chuck Klosterman

Tags: control



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First, you must love yourself. And if you do that convincingly enough, others will love you too much.

Chuck Klosterman


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The main problem with mass media is that it makes it impossible to fall in love without any acumen of normalcy. There is no "normal," because everyone is being twisted by the same sources simultaneously. You can't compare your relationship with the playful couple who lives next door because they're probably modeling themselves after Chandler Bing and Monica Geller.

Chuck Klosterman


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The mass media causes sexual misdirection: It prompts us to need something deeper than what we want. This is why Woody Allen has made nebbish guys cool; he makes people assume there is something profound about having a relationship based on witty conversation and intellectual discourse. There isn't. It's just another gimmick, and it's no different than wanting to be with someone because they're thin or rich or the former lead singer of Whiskeytown.

Chuck Klosterman


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If you’re the type of person who wants to associate exclusively with those who perfectly mirror your own ethical worldview, you’re reducing significantly the scope of your potential life experience.

Chuck Klosterman


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It has always been my belief that people are remembered for the sum of their accomplishments but defined by their singular failure.

Chuck Klosterman


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If someone breaks your heart, just punch them in the face. Oh sure, it seems obvious now, but you’d be amazed at how many people don’t think of it when it’s relevant. Seriously, just punch them in the face and go get some ice cream.

Chuck Klosterman


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I want fake love. But that's all I want, and that's why I can't have it.

Chuck Klosterman


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Nora Ephron accidentally ruined a lot of lives.

Chuck Klosterman


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Is there anything more attractive than a polite person with limitless self-belief? There is not.

Chuck Klosterman


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