Light

That's how I feel-
like the winter-fringed
breeze might scoop
me up into its wings,

fly

away with me trapped
in its feathered embrace.
I am a snowflake.
A wisp of eiderdown,

liberated

from gravity. My body
is light. Ephemeral.
My head is light.
I want to sway

beneath

the weight of air,
dizzy with thought.
Light filters through
my closed eyelids.

The sun,

chasing shadows,
tells me I'm not
afloat in dreams.

Ellen Hopkins

Tags: light



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Not Exactly True

That skin hate is dead.
There will never be color
blindness in a culture of

fear.

But when you live afraid
of your neighbor, the monster
you should most walk
in terror of

thrives.

It starts as a little thing,
small enough to burrow
into your pores, take up
excruciating residence

in

the dark recesses of your brain.
Its name is paranoia,
and it spreads like an oil
spill, there in

the shadows,

chokes your humanity.
Threatens your soul.

Ellen Hopkins


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Disappointment

Can do a couple things.
It can drop you into a giant
sucking sinkhole of

depression,

a place you have to fight
to climb out of. Or it
can trigger an epic

mania

to overcome the odds
and transform failure
into success. Say you

swing

as high as the chains will
take you because you seek
the thrill of flight, and on the

up-

kick, you lose your seat.
Injury is likely. But if you
worry about falling

down,

and never chance "up,"
the sky will remain
forever out of reach.

Ellen Hopkins

Tags: disappointment



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I've been alone since my mom met Scott.
He sucked the nectar from her heart
like a famished butterfly. No nurture,
no nourishment left for Kristina.

A vacation is a poor substitute
for love.

Ellen Hopkins

Tags: life parents teen



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Spilling a Secret

What its size,
will have varying
consequences. It’s not
possible to predict
what will happen
if you
open the gunnysack,
let the cat escape.
A liberated feline
might purr on your lap,
or it might scratch
your eyes out. You can’t
tell
until you loosen the knot.
Do you chance losing
a friendship, if that
friend’s well-being
will
only be preserved
by betraying sworn-to
silence trust? Once
the seam is ripped, can
it be
mended again?
And if that proves
impossible, will you be
okay
when it all falls to pieces?

Ellen Hopkins

Tags: poetry novels contemporary adult chick-lit spilling-a-secret verse-novels womens-fiction



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Shane was born perfectly fine, despite the same genetic pairing.
One in four.
That's what their odds were.
God gave Shelby SMA.
Shane just got "gay".

Ellen Hopkins


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When People Ask

How he’s doing now, I have

no idea what to say except for,

“Better.” I don’t know if that’s

true, or what goes on in a place

like Aspen Springs, not that any-

one knows he’s there, thank God.

He has dropped off most people’s

radar, although that’s kind of odd.

Before he took this unbelievable

turn, Conner was top rung on our

social ladder. But with his crash

and burn no longer news of the day,

all but a gossipy few have quit

trying to fill in the blanks.

One exception is Kendra, who

for some idiotic reason still

loves him and keeps asking about

him, despite the horrible way he

dumped her. Kendra may be pretty,

but she’s not especially bright.

Ellen Hopkins


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I Won’t Fly Today

Too much to do, despite the snow,

which made all local schools close

their doors. What a winter! Usually,

I love watching the white stuff fall.

But after a month with only short

respites, I keep hoping for a critical

blue sky. Instead, amazing waves

of silvery clouds sweep over the crest

of the Sierra, open their obese

bellies, and release foot upon foot

of crisp new powder. The ski

resorts would be happy, except

the roads are so hard to travel

that people are staying home.

So it kind of boggles the mind

that three guys are laying carpet

in the living room. Just goes to

show the power of money. In less

than an hour, the stain Conner left

on the hardwood will be a ghost.

Ellen Hopkins


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The Stain

That Conner left on our lives will

not vanish as easily. I don’t care

about Mom and her birds.

Their estimation of my brother

doesn’t bother me at all. Neither

do I worry about Dad and

what his lobbyist buddies think.

His political clout has not diminished.

As twins go, Conner and I don’t share

a deep affection, but we do have

a nine-months-in-the-same-womb

connection. Not to mention

a crowd of mutual friends. God,

I’ll never forget going to school

the day after that ugly scene.

The plan was to sever the gossip

grapevine from the start with

an obvious explanation—

accident. Mom’s orders were

clear. Conner’s reputation

was to be protected at all costs.

When I arrived, the rumors

had already started, thanks

to our neighbor, Bobby Duvall.

Conner Sykes got hurt.

Conner Sykes was shot.

Conner Sykes is in the hospital.

Is Conner Sykes, like, dead?

I fielded every single question

with the agreed fabrication.

But eventually, I was forced to

concede that, though his wounds

would heal, he was not coming

back to school right away.

Conner Sykes wasn’t dead.

But he wasn’t exactly “okay.

Ellen Hopkins


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And the thought of that makes me want to open a vein, experience pain, know I'm alive, despite this living death.

Ellen Hopkins


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