I don't damsel well. Distress, I can do. Damseling? Not so much.
James PattersonTags: empowerment distress pretense trouble maximum-ride james-patterson damsels-in-distress get-over-it
Hello, Max," he said quietly, searching my face. "How do you feel?"
Which was a ten on the "imbecilic question" scale of one to ten.
Why, I feel fine, Jeb," I said brightly. "How about you?"
Any nausea? Headache?"
Yep. And it's standing here talking to me.
Tags: world sports other saving ride max maximum extreme batchelder jeb
I HAS A CORM!!
James PattersonLet's just say that if these scientist had been using their brilliance for good instead of evil, cars would run off water vapor and leave fresh compost behind them; no one would be hungry; no one would be ill; all buildings would be earthquake-, bomb-, and flood-proof; and the world's entire economy would have collapsed and been replaced by one based on the value of chocolate.
James PattersonTags: maximum-ride
If you're ever feeling a lack of middle-aged white men, just pop into the Capitol. Not so much the House of Representatives, which has a bit more color and texture, but the Senate -- jeez. Yes, let's have more testosterone running the country.
Maximum Ride, School's Out--Forever
Tags: funny senate maximum-ride capitol
You stand out like a fart in a church.
James PattersonTags: maximum-ride james-patterson the-final-warning
When my son, Jack, was four, I had to make a trip to Los Angeles. I asked him if he was going to miss me. 'Not so much,' Jack told me. 'You're not going to miss me?' I said. Jack shook his head, and he said, 'Love means you can never be apart.
James PattersonOh, my God. It hit me like a tsunami then: how perfect he was for me, how he was everything I could possibly hope for, as a friend, boyfriend - maybe even more. He was it for me. There would be no more looking. I really, really loved him, with a whole new kind of love I'd never felt before, something that made every other kind of love I'd ever felt just seem washed out and wimpy in comparison. I loved him with every cell in my body, every thought in my head, every feather in my wings, every breath in my lungs. And air sacs.
James PattersonIggy: Now what? Who you gonna call?
A quiet voice in the hallway outside: Ghostbusters!
(Captain Perry and John groan)
John: That phrase is ruined forever.
Huh - Why is Max in the kitchen?"
Dr.Martinez: "We're cooking."
Gazzy: "She's just keeping you company, right?"
Dr.Martinez: "No, she's cooking."
Nudge: "Cooking...food?"
Max: "Yes, I'm cooking food, and it's great, and you're going to eat it, you twerps!
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