Lula had Eminem cranked up. He was rapping about trailer park girls and how they go round the outside, and I was wondering what the heck that meant. I'm a white girl from Trenton. I don't know these things. I need a rap
cheat sheet.

Janet Evanovich

Tags: ranger stephanie-plum morelli lula to-the-nines

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Excuse me?" I said, palms down on the Formica tabletop. "Coffee? I thought we came here for pie." "I don't eat the kind of pie they serve here." I felt a flash of heat go through my stomach. I knew firsthand the kind of pie Ranger liked.

Janet Evanovich

Tags: romance funny stephanie-plum-ranger

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Do you have someone watching her house?” (Stephanie)
“That kind of surveillance only happens in the movies. We’re so underbudgeted we’re one step away from
holding bake sales to pay for toilet paper. (Morelli)

Janet Evanovich

Tags: finger-lickin-fifteen

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On the bright side, I'm sure this isn't the last time you'll ever get firebombed, so maybe you'll have better luck next time.

Janet Evanovich

Tags: fire luck

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-You're gloating, Max. It's not flattering. Somebody needs to teach you a little humility.-
-A good woman could do that.-
-She'd have to be armed and dangerous.-

Janet Evanovich

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Look at you! You look like Rangeman Barbie. You got a gun and everything.
-Lula

Janet Evanovich

Tags: humour

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Everyone wants a Christmas tree. If you had a Christmas tree Santa would bring you stuff! Like hair curlers and slut shoes.

Janet Evanovich

Tags: humor christmas diesel

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I checked my pocketbook to make sure I had the essentials... beeper, tissues, hair spray, flashlight, cuffs, lipstick, gun with bullets, recharged cell phone, recharged stun gun, hairbrush, gum, pepper spray, nail file. Was I a kick-ass bounty hunter, or what?"(Three to get deadly)Janet evanovich

Janet Evanovich

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How was your day?" Morelli asked me. "Oh, you know, the usual. Stole a truck. Blew up a building, and brought seven monkeys home with me.

Janet Evanovich

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I rented Ghostbusters, my all-time favorite inspirational movie. I picked up some microwave, popcorn, a KitKat, a bag of bite-sized Reese's peanut butter cups, and a box of instant hot chocolate with marshmallows. Do I know how to have a good time, or what?

Janet Evanovich

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