... Brandon's going to talk to a B-O-Y, and -"
"What?"
"That's your assignment tonight. You converse in public with a boy. You've heard of them, right? They're like girls, but with penises?

J.C. Lillis

Tags: humour

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Well, who doesn't love a good mpreg?"
"A what?"
"Sim gets man-pregnant? Gives birth to twins during a tornado?"
"I'll pretend I never heard that."
"Here, I'll read you the wedding one -"
"NO.

J.C. Lillis

Tags: humour fanfiction mpreg

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You can't stay fucked up forever, can you? You need to start putting yourself out there and getting humiliated like the rest of us. Only then will you be a Real Boy

J.C. Lillis

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Pretentious."
"So? I love pretentious people!"
"Why?"
"They try so hard to be interesting, you don't have to do any work.

J.C. Lillis

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I can tell I'm being annoying, the kind of annoying where it feels like I haven't showered for days and everyone should just stay away.

J.C. Lillis

Tags: humour

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God is like junior high, Brandon. Graduate already.

J.C. Lillis

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I've never seen a naked torso that wasn't on a cross, at least not so close up. I don't know where to look. His belly button. Belly button. Look at the belly button.

J.C. Lillis

Tags: humour catholic virgin

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Status: Naked. On bed. With boy. Systems overheating. Sudden doubts multiplying. Meltdown imminent.

J.C. Lillis

Tags: sex humour

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I am one man with a laptop. When I give the world my characters, it's because I don't want to keep them for myself. You don't like what I made them do? Fucking tell me I'm wrong! Rewrite the story. Throw in a new plot twist. Make up your own ending.

J.C. Lillis

Tags: fanfiction

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You've thrown a lot of pennies in ponds," she says. "Haven't you.

J.C. Lillis

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