I spun away from him. I didn’t need his pity.
I started walking in the opposite direction of the house. I didn’t know where I was going, I just wanted to get away from him.
He called out, “I still love you.”
I froze. And then slowly,
I turned around to look at him. “Don’t say that
I’m sorry for screwing everything up. I hurt you again, and for that I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I don’t want to do that anymore. So … I’m not going to stay
for the wedding. I’m just going to take off now. I won’t see you again, not for a long time. Probably for the best. Being near you like this, it hurts. And
Jere”—Conrad cleared his throat and stepped backward, making space between us—“he’s the one who needs you.”
Hoarsely, he said, “I need you to know that no matter what happens, it was worth it to me. Being with you, loving you. It was all worth it
I went over and over everything that had ever happened between us. I couldn’t keep doing it, going back and fourth, holding her close and then pushing her away. It wasn’t right
Jenny HanWait!" he yelled.
I didn't turn around, I walked faster. Then I heard him slam his fist on the hood of his car. I almost stopped.
Maybe I would have if he'd followed me. But he didn't. He got in his car and he left, just like he said he would.
And then I had a thought, clear as day. I would never be somebody's favorite again. I would never be a kid again, not in the same way. That was all over now. She was really gone.
Jenny HanIt wasn’t was easy as picking one over the other. Nothing ever was. It wasn’t as though I’d even had a choice, not really.
Jenny HanNothing, nothing felt better than the way sand felt beneath my feet. It was both solid and shifting. Constant and ever-changing. It was summer.
Jenny HanThere are moments in every girl’s life that are bigger than we know at the time. When you look back, you say, that was one of those life-changing,
fork-in-the-road moments and I didn’t even see it coming. I had no idea.
He didn’t give me flowers or candy. He gave me the moon and the stars. Infinity
-Belly Conklin-
There hadn’t been one specific moment. It was like gradualy waking up. You go from being asleep to the space between dreaming and awake and then into consciousness. It’s a slow process, but when you’re awake, there’s no mistaking it. There was no mistaking that it had been love.
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