I remembered the last time I put this thing into my eye it was more painful than watching old political speeches while listening to the “Macarena” and having a root canal performed by an angry, clumsy chimp.

John Zakour

Tags: pain humour funny



Go to quote


My second thought was to fire a gunshot, but the last time I did that his security robots jumped me. It only takes one cavity search by a robot to convince you that’s an experience you don’t want to have twice. This called for a more subtle approach.

John Zakour

Tags: humour funny search



Go to quote


I often say if men were meant to fly we would have been born with either feathers and wings or at the very least parachutes that pop out of our butts.

John Zakour

Tags: humour funny flying



Go to quote


I didn’t respond to that. I’m not scared of heights. I’m just scared of falling from heights.

John Zakour

Tags: humour funny heights



Go to quote


Thing is, I am not a big fan of hovers. I firmly believe that if man was meant to fly we’d have feathers, rubber bones, or better insurance coverage.

John Zakour

Tags: humor fantasy comedy sci-fi



Go to quote


Walking into Nova Hollywood, I remembered why I didn’t come here more often. I like a good slice of cheese as much as the next guy, but this place would be too cheesy for a giant mutant rat who had been starving for a week.

John Zakour

Tags: humor fantasy comedy sci-fi



Go to quote


Twoa said, obviously still in my brain. "It was my pheromones," she said defensively. I looked up at her; she was sniffing herself. She looked down at me. "Okay, maybe it wasn’t ALL the pheromones," she admitted. "Nobody makes a good deodorant for superheroes.

John Zakour

Tags: humor comedy sci-fi



Go to quote


So, what you’re basically telling me is death is boring but no worse than hanging out with family.

John Zakour

Tags: humor fantasy comedy sci-fi



Go to quote


HARV, can you help at all here?” I asked, spinning downward.
“I am writing your obituary. Well, not so much writing it as updating it,” HARV told me.
If I lived, I was going to kill HARV.

John Zakour

Tags: humor fantasy comedy sci-fi



Go to quote


My number one fear is heights. Well, not so much the heights but the falling from heights. Actually the falling isn’t that bad (I have a strong heart), it’s the sudden stops that are painful. Believe me — I experienced it once.

John Zakour

Tags: humor fantasy comedy sci-fi



Go to quote


« first previous
Page 3 of 4.
next last »

©gutesprueche.com

Data privacy

Imprint
Contact
Wir benutzen Cookies

Diese Website verwendet Cookies, um Ihnen die bestmögliche Funktionalität bieten zu können.

OK Ich lehne Cookies ab