All these people talk so eloquently about getting back to good old-fashioned values. Well, as an old poop I can remember back to when we had those old-fashioned values, and I say let's get back to the good old-fashioned First Amendment of the good old-fashioned Constitution of the United States -- and to hell with the censors! Give me knowledge or give me death!
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.Tags: paraphrased education censorship free-speech
The umpire had comical news. The congregation had been theoretically spotted from the air by a theoretical enemy. They were all theoretically dead now. The theoretical corpses laughed and ate a hearty noontime meal.
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.That's the point. Every kind of animal thinks its own kind of animal is wonderful. So people getting married think they're wonderful, and that they're going to have a baby-- that's wonderful, when actually they're as ugly as rhinoceroses. Just because we think we're so wonderful doesn't mean we really are. We could be really terrible animals and just never admit it because it would hurt so much.
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.Tags: humanity jack-patton
Being a Humanist means trying to behave decently without expectation of rewards or punishment after you are dead.
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.Tags: atheism afterlife humanism secularism
Until you die .. it's all life.
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.If you can do a half-assed job of anything, you're a one-eyed man in a kingdom of the blind.
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.Tags: humor work competence
Billy Pilgrim, there in the creekbed, thought he, Billy Pilgrim, was turning to steam painlessly.
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.Nobody talked much as the expedition crossed the moon. There was nothing appropriate to say. One thing was clear: Absolutely everybody in the city was supposed to be dead, regardless of what they were, and that anybody that moved in it represented a flaw in the design. There were to be no moon men at all.
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.He ate a pear. It was a hard one. It fought back against his grinding teeth. It snapped in juicy protest.
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.Somewhere in the night there were cries of grief. With nothing better to do, Billy shuffled in their direction. He wondered what ragedy so many had found to lament out of doors.
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