Zach, it doesn't matter which talking heads the Republicrats put up as their candidates. Either way you're voting to maintain the status quo. Is that what you want?"
"Ummm...."
"Are you pro-choice?"
"Sure, I guess." Abortion's not something a gay man has to think about often.
"And you must be in favour of allowing gays to marry?"
"Of course." But I'd have to be dating someone first, right?
"And you believe in the decriminalization of marijuana?"
"I suppose." There was no way i was going to to argue with a man who sold bongs for a living on that one.
"Don't you think you should be able to vote against our out-of-control welfare state without having to vote against those basic rights? Basic rights which should be protected by our constitution?"
"Well-"
"Have you even read the constitution, Zach?"
"I don't think so," I admitted in surprise.
He shook his head at me. "Neither has the president, Zach. Think about that."
He left a stack of pamphlets on the counter and headed for Ruby's. It was going to be a long campaign season.
Uh, do you want a job?"
"I got one."
"Oh." I wasn't sure why I had assumed he was unemployed. "Okay."
"Sure."
"Sure, what?"
"I want a job."
"You just said you already had a job."
"I do. I got two. But if you're hirin', I'll quit one off 'em. It hella sucks anyway."
I didn't know what "helasux" was, but i wasn't about to ask. "Can you organize all these movies?"
"Easy."
"When can you start?"
He smiled at me. "Now.
Heathers!" I said triumphantly. "I think I've got that one here somewhere."
"Hey. Ram, doesn't this cafeteria have a no-fags allowed policy?"
"What?"
"The answer is, 'They seem to have an open door policy on assholes, though, don't they?'"
I just stood there, trying to figure out if he was calling me a fag or an asshole or both, and he rolled his eyes at me again.
"It's a line from Heathers, man.
First thing Monday morning, Ruby came in. She seemed upset. "Zach, I've had a vision," she said immediately.
"Was it a dream," Angelo began suddenly, with a wicked grin on his face, "where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?"
Ruby and I both gaped at him. "Of course not," Ruby said with disgust, "Why would you even ask something like that?"
"Just wonderin'." He was facing her, But he held up a DVD case, facing me. 'Real Genius'. I had no idea what that was supposed to mean.
Ruby shook her head at him and then turned back to me. "There was a bird. It tried to land in your hands, but a giant horse scared it away."
As usual when Ruby announced her visions, I had no idea how to respond. I just smiled. "That's fascinating."
She nodded sagely. "I hope you're nat planning any horse riding this weekend."
Before I could answer, Nero Sensei burst through the doo, breathless. "Do any of you own the blue convertible parked at Jeremy's?"
Which meant another kid had pucked off the balcony.
"Hope the top wasn't down," Angelo said lightly.
Sensei shook his head as he headed back out the door. "No, but it's a soft top, and Tim had cranberry juice before class. It's gonna stain."
Ruby followed Nero out the door. Angelo turned to me. His eyes were sparkling and he was grinning from ear to ear. "Best job I ever had," he said. and I had to smile back.
His arms went around my waist. "I been meanin' to tell you, Zach-I want a raise. And that's not a sexual innuendo."
"I'll see what I can do."
His lips brushed min, and he smiled. "I lied."
"You don't want a raise?"
"It was a sexual innuendo."
"I think I love you." The words were out of m mouth before I knew I was going to say them. I wanted to take them back immediately. If talking about moving in together sent him into a full blown panic attack, there was no telling what the L-word was going to do to him.
He froze, just for a second, and I braced for the worst, but he just smiled and simply said, "I know.
Wanna hang out for a bit?"
"You tryin' to get in my pants now that you know I'm queer?" he asked in an impudent tone.
"No!"
"Yeah."
"Yeah, what?"
"Yeah, I wanna hang out." He smiled over at me.
Oh God! You asked Jared for lube?"
"Yeah. Why not?"
"It just seems weird."
He shook his head at me and smiled. "When we first met, I thought you were an uptight prep."
"And now?"
"Now I know you're an uptight prep." He pressed closer. "Cute, though."
"I though you were a punk."
"And now?"
"I think you're amazing."
"Zach?"
"Yeah?"
"Shut up a d kiss me.
What the hell happened to your leg?" Ang asked him.
Matt looked down at his shin, which was scraped and oozing and seemed to be caked in mud. "Crashed."
"Crashed what?" Ang asked.
"My mountain bike. We just got back."
"You crashed, then what? Rolled in dirt?"
He laughed. "Something like that actually. It's not a successful ride if you don't bleed." He must not have noticed the look of horror on my face, because he asked, suddenly enthusiastic, "You guys ride?"Angelo and I just looked at each other, and he seemed to realize that was a "no." "Too bad. Well, make yourselves at home. Beer's in the fridge. I have to get cleaned up. Kickoff's in ten minutes."
"Football?" Angelo asked.
Matt looked at his as if he had just asked if the sky was really blue. "Yeah! First game of the regular season!" We just stared blankly at him, and he just laughed and disappeared down the hall.
Angelo looked at me with a smile on his face. "Four fags watchin' football. Must be pretty fuckin' cold in hell right now.
Tags: funny gay sports matt zach angelo
You sayin' you want to go?"
"Don't you?"
"Hell no!"
"Okay,I'll tell Matt and Jared that they can go to Paris without us."
The only response was stunned silence, and I finally turned to smile at him. "Do you want to reconsider?" I asked.
"The wedding's in Paris?"
"Yep."
His dark eyes were huge, and I could see so much in them. He was excited, almost giddy. I could see it bubbling up in him, but he was trying t stay calm and not get his hopes up. "Can we afford Paris?"
"No," I said, "but it doesn't matter. Cole's footing the bill."
He grabbed my shirt and pushed me back against the countertop, almost as if he was going to kiss me, but stopped short, looking into my eyes. "Are you serious?"
"Would I lie to you about something like this?"
"No."
"Do you think I'd make it up just to tease you?"
"No."
"Yes."
He backed up a step. "Yes what?"
he asked.
I could hardly keep from laughing that I'd finally managed to turn the tables on him with his own backward form of communication. "Yes, I'm absolutely serious. Cole offered to fly us all to Paris."
...
His expression was so full of hope, I thought it was a good thing I hadn't tried to say no. He put his hand against my cheek and looked into my eyes. "Tell me what you want to do."
All I had to do was tell him the truth. I brushed his hair out of his eyes and said, "I want to do whatever will make you happy."
He smiled at me, the huge, excited smile of a child who woke up from his nap to find himself in Disneyland. "I want to go to Paris."
"Okay," I said as I leaned down to kiss him. "Then you will.
Tags: zach gay-romance angelo
Jared was completely gone now, holding his stomach and laughing so hard that tears were running down his face. Matt turned on him and snapped, "It's not funny," which only made Jared laugh harder.
"Any of you guys strict about top or bottom?" Angelo asked, "'Cause if so, you'll screw it all up-"
"Literally," Cole said.
"And we'll have to start all over." Angelo turned to Matt. "If you got a strong preference you better say so now."
"Lay it all out, so to speak," Cole said.
"On the table." Angelo said.
"For all to see."
"Zach does like to watch," Angelo said, winking at me, and I was relieved that with the direction the conversation was going, nobody took him seriously.
"Then it's settled!" Cole said. "Who's going where with whom first? Zach, I think you're up." He winked at me. "Or you soon will be."
"Oh dear God," Mat moaned, hanging his head. "I knew I shouldn't have come."
"Don't worry about it a bit," Cole said. "I'm sure Zach can coax at least one more out of you."
Jared laughed so hard, I was amazed he managed to stay in his chair.
Tags: funny gay jon matt zach jared cole angelo
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