Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.

Mark Twain

Tags: humor

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So I hove a brick through his window...

Mark Twain

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When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.

Mark Twain

Tags: humor ignorance arrogance

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If there is no smoking in heaven, I'm not interested

Mark Twain

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Anyone who can only think of one way to spell a word obviously lacks imagination.

Mark Twain

Tags: spelling

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La gentillesse est le langage qu'un sourd peut entendre et une aveugle peut voir

Mark Twain

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Good judgement is the result of experience and experience the result of bad judgement.

Mark Twain

Tags: paradox

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Don't explain your author, read him right and he explains himself.

Mark Twain

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I believe I have no prejudices whatsoever. All I need to know is that a man is a member of the human race. That's bad enough for me.

Mark Twain

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All kings is mostly rapscallions, as fur as I can make out.

Mark Twain

Tags: royalty

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