Maybe this was what Aunt Peg meant all along - returning was a weird thing. You can never visit the same place twice. Each time, it's a different story. By the very act of coming back, you wipe our what came before.

Maureen Johnson

Tags: change moving-on returning



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I had one class in the morning, the mysteriously named "Further Maths". It was two hours long and so deeply frightening that I think I went into a trance.

Maureen Johnson

Tags: humor math



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Quarrels are a natural part of relationships. Making up is always the best part.

Maureen Johnson


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Well, what now? You have no job. I have no job. Wanna play Jenga?

Maureen Johnson


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He's been in love with Miss Gina since high school, but he doesn't really know how to talk to girls, so he's just been...staying around her since then. He just tends to go where she goes."
"Isn't that stalking?" Jazza said.
"Legally, no," I replied. "I asked my parents this when I was little. What he does is creepy and socially awkward, but it's not actually stalking.

Maureen Johnson


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The essay I had to read was called, "An Essay on Criticism" by Alexander Pope.
The first challenge was that the essay was, in fact, a very long poem in "heroic couplets". If something is called an essay, it should be an essay.

Maureen Johnson


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I could pretend, at least, and if I pretended long enough, maybe I could make it into a reality.

Maureen Johnson


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It was almost funny. Life seemed downright accidental in its brevity, and death a punch line to a lousy joke.

Maureen Johnson


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We Deveauxs preferred to talk you to death, rather than face you in physical combat.

Maureen Johnson


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She introduced herself to my parents with one of her mighty, bunny-crushing handshakes. (I'd never seen Claudia crush a bunny, to be fair, but that's the approximate level of pressure.)

Maureen Johnson

Tags: humor humour funny



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