Sadness is pathetically limited to the range of thirst, it is just a sip of emotion, tightly buckled to a frown, quenchable.

Miranda July

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I typed "royal family" into a dream-interpretation website, but they didn't have that in their database, so then I typed "butt" and hit "interpret," and this came back: To see your buttocks in your dream represents your instincts and urges. It also said: To dream that your buttocks are misshapen suggests undeveloped or wounded aspects of your psyche. But my butt was shaped all right, so that let me know my psyche was developed, and the first part told me to trust my instincts, to trust my butt, the butt that trusted him.

Miranda July

Tags: butt

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Will you date me when I ask you out? it asked.

Yes.

Even if I’m ugly and you don’t like my personality?

Yes.

No, you won’t.

I will!

You’re just saying that because you’re in a hurry.

Well, it won’t be my fault if I miss the bus.

Goodbye, sweetness.

Bye! Where’s my backpack?

It’s on the counter.

Oh. Bye!

Miranda July

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