What I say is, a town isn’t a town without a bookstore. It may call itself a town, but unless it’s got a bookstore, it knows it’s not foolin’ a soul.

Neil Gaiman

Tags: books bookstore towns



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There is a proverbial saying chiefly concerned with warning against too closely calculating the numerical value of un-hatched chicks.

Neil Gaiman

Tags: humor



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If you cut us, do we not bleed?' Mr. Vandemar pondered this for a moment, in the dark. Then he said with perfect accuracy, 'No.

Neil Gaiman

Tags: vandemar



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Richard opened his hand, and the key stared up at him from his palm. "By my crooked teeth," asked Richard, remembering, "who am I?

Neil Gaiman

Tags: richard



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Can I help you?" said the footman. Richard had been told to fuck off and die with more warmth and good humor.

Neil Gaiman

Tags: richards



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The house smelled musty and damp, and a little sweet, as if it were haunted by the ghosts of long-dead cookies.

Neil Gaiman

Tags: humor ghosts scent smell cookies descriptions setting



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I'll be your puppy. What do you want me to do? Chew your slippers? Piss on the kitchen floor? Lick your nose? Sniff your crotch? I bet there's nothing a puppy can do that I can't do!

Neil Gaiman

Tags: love puppy



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Nothin’ wrong with witchfinding. I’d like to be a witchfinder. It’s just, well, you’ve got to take it in turns. Today we’ll go out witchfinding, an’ tomorrow we could hide, an’ it’d be the witches’ turn to find US.

Neil Gaiman


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He couldn’t see why people made such a fuss about people eating their silly old fruit anyway, but life would be a lot less fun if they didn’t. And there was never an apple, in Adam’s opinion, that wasn’t worth the trouble you got into for eating it.

Neil Gaiman

Tags: humor



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Most books on witchcraft will tell you that witches work naked. This is because most books on witchcraft were written by men.

Neil Gaiman

Tags: humor men women witchcraft witches



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