I think that last batch of sea monkeys ate my cat!!!
Neil LeckmanTags: neil-leckman virtual-cubicle wurms
I like to provide American humor for British soccer coaches when possible. During keeper practice I'll offer to stand behind the goal and shag a few balls!!
Neil LeckmanTags: neil-leckman wurms virtual-cubicle-wurms
At a long meeting a man next to me, British I hope, said, "Man, I'd kill for a fag about now" I chuckled when everyone moved away from him but me.
"Why did everyone do that?"
"They say that smoking can kill, and they're just being cautious"
"What about that fellow there smiling at me?"
"Don't know, maybe he's a chain smoker...
Tags: neil-leckman wurms
While walking with a British coach.
Why do you chuckle every time we walk by the theater that is showing "Free Willy"?
Tags: neil-leckman
We started our journey across the waistlands by folowing the enormous belt!!
Neil LeckmanTags: neil-leckman virtual-cubicle-wurms
Dale, a Plutonian Dreg Bug, the kind with seventeen eyes and a bad temper, got nailed in one of his eyes by a wild dart. Fight broke out when he punched Earl in the nose. Earl’s nose is very sensitive, hell it’s how he sees, sort of. Earl plopped down on the floor crying when a Flying Mugwhap flew over and ate Dale’s eye. Dale grabbed the Mugwhap and squeezed a good deal of the life out of it before the bouncer stopped him. Karen, the bouncer, is a reticulated Hive Mother, and a mean mother when she’s pissed off. She walked over and flicked Dale upside his head. That flick knocked Dale out cold, and cost him two more eyes when he hit the wall. She helped Earl up and bought him a drink. A nasty drink by all the comments I’ve heard. Something between varnish and the stuff people get in the corners of their mouths with a nice aftertaste of silver polish. Earl seemed to like it though.
Neil LeckmanTags: thoughts neil-leckman
Asthmatic spewer of filth gasps, but clean air does not suffice
To fuel fires fueled by thoughts got rotten
Lest we all be forgotten things
That sit like dust upon the mantel of her mind
Tags: poems neil-leckman
Thrice damned she howls like Cerberus to the night
Guarding virtues that lie like forgotten stains
On oaken floors that pave the willow lined paths of the past
That lead to a meadow filled with the detritus of wasted love
Rotting under a forgotten sun that no longer shines
In a heart gone cold therein lies the haste of anger.
Tags: neil-leckman virtual-cubicle wurms
She cuts with daggerous eyes of fire
Words like poison coat fangs of bad intent
And biting remarks carve into holiday delights
Leaving dark the places once light.
Tags: neil-leckman
Well they have to have something to wean Caluntians off Venusian moles. Seems humans are the best therapy, to consume that is. They say we are a bit gamey though. An acquired taste, one we hope not many acquire.
Neil LeckmanTags: thoughts neil-leckman
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